Thanks to all of you out there for your comments, yes we have quite a bit in common. Passive aggression is still alive and well living at my house.
Don’t you ever get tired of always having to be the “grown up”? Ever feel like you would like the passive aggressive to take care of you for a change? Or what about “he’s/she’s turned me into such a nag!”
This is one of those days for me. LOL.
Over the last 10 yrs. I’ve probably learned to play as passive aggressively as anyone. Some of the stuff I find rather humorous like the “toilet paper wars” where when the toilet paper is getting to the bottom of the roll, each one uses less and less till someone has to change it.
Or the passive aggressive blind eye to the trash in the house. When my BF and I got together, he informed me taking out the trash was the “man’s job” and it was his job to take the cans out to the street every week. Somewhere since then, I think a little resentment has been brewing. Now the trash in the kitchen overflows, the trash in his bathroom overflows. Most of the time I will just go ahead and take it out, but every once in awhile when I feel it’s not just my job, I dig in my heels and pull the bag up a little more to fit more trash in there, until he takes it out. Sometimes he’ll eventually get around to it, but then gets even by not putting a new bag in. Such is my life. LOL.
All this goes on without any communication on either part.
Then stuff comes along I don’t find quite so humorous. As I stated here before, the BF has finally gone back to work. While essentially that is a good thing, his work weeks are short (so are the paychecks) plus he’s traveling from job to job so we’re going in the hole for gas. At least he’s feeling better about doing something useful again.
My problem is that since he is essentially working part time, he could be getting unemployment to make up the difference. He has not heard a word from them since he filed his form probably 2 to 3 months ago. This is where the passive aggressive behavior comes in. I have asked him over and over to check his status. This is one thing he knows I basically have no control over. While he keeps saying he “forgot”, or will apologize profusely, he still does nothing about it. The other day he even went so far as to pretend he was going to look into it when I mentioned it, but he never did. The one thing I will give him credit for is at least he doesn’t lie to me about it.
He also went to the doctor’s about a month ago. At the time he couldn’t get the lab work done they wanted so he has to go back. This too is something he could easily take care of on one of the days he only works half or one of the days he’s not scheduled to work at all. Once again, something I have no control over. He’s already had a mini-stroke so he knows that it is really important to me that he takes care of himself. This too, he seems to passive aggressively “forget”.
No one likes a nag. I am not normally a nag. I mention something and then I usually let it go, unless it never gets resolved. I would rather someone tell me either they have no intention of doing something at all, ever, or it’s none of my business, than to go through this passive aggressive BS all the time.
As I said, the passive aggression is still alive and well living at my house. LOL
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