Humor, holiday blues, and living with a passive aggressive husband, wife or child. You have to have a sense of humor, because you get the holiday blues, because of coping with a passive aggressive spouse. They just seem to go hand in hand, don’t they? LOL.
Whatever you celebrate this time of year, be it Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, or many other celebrations I know nothing about, if you’re already having problems in a relationship, there is nothing like this time of year to accentuate it. Between the stress of Christmas shopping, not enough money, normal depression over your relationship, and having to deal with family members, it can all seem like it’s crashing in around you. So My Dears, I am here with ammunition to fight back! No matter what kind of situation you’re in right now, this can be the time to mark the end of a bad year and a stepping stone into the future of good years. Who says we have to wait for New Year’s Day?
My Tips For Beating the Holiday Blues
1) Don’t fight it! All of us at sometime have just wanted the holidays to be over, kicking and screaming all through the season. It doesn’t seem to work. No matter what we do, we’re still faced with it at some point. So, instead of fighting it, get into it. It’s not about the money and the gifts. It’s about the love and the Spirit. If you don’t have it, get around people that will share theirs. Remember what it was like as a kid, and if you have bad memories from childhood, then make some new good ones. I know. It all sounds easier said than done right? Who wants to be “merry-making” when you feel like crap? That’s when we need it the most. Go for it.
2) “Sing joyful noise unto the Lord”. This is one of my favorite scriptures and one of my favorite tips. (Just as a side note, I could never understand with this being a well known scripture, why church hymns sound so depressing. I’m so glad they’ve started introducing contemporary music). Anyway, hardly anything will do your heart as much good as music. Whether you’re singing the corny Christmas carols, rocking to your favorite heavy metal, or twanging to a little country, it can’t help but lift you up and help you avoid depression.
3) Humor, once again is another old friend when it comes to managing holiday stress. Many of us find it difficult to laugh at our passive aggressive spouse’s behavior because the resentments and the wounds sometimes go to deep, but you can still laugh at other things. If nothing else go to YouTube and search “funny” or “comedy” movies. Not everyone’s sense of humor is the same, as I found out when I posted the video in my last post and had 2 people “unsubscribe” lol, but there is bound to be a couple on there you would enjoy. The thing that’s nice about YouTube is they’re usually pretty short, so it doesn’t take a lot of time out of your day to get a laugh or two.
4) Be realistic in your expectations. If you’re involved with someone who has a passive aggressive personality disorder, you are never going to get that “perfect Christmas” or holiday. Many of us get the blues and depression during the holidays because we think we’re missing out on something that goes on in “normal people’s lives” and in “normal” families. Just what is “normal” anyway? For us, normal is what we live every day. It’s normal for us. If you’re not happy with it during the rest of the year, you’re not going to be happy about it now.
It’s up to you to change it for you. It’s still magic and now we’re older and probably have a better sense of what it truly means than we ever did. Make some new traditions, help somewhere where you’re needed by volunteering. Nothing makes you feel better than knowing you did something really good for someone else who really needed the help. Most of all, remember that this is time you will never get back. Let’s make a pact right here that we are not going to allow our passive aggressive spouses, partners, in-laws, co-workers, children, or anyone else spoil it for us, including ourselves.
If you’re depressed, or more angry than usual, feel free to get it out right here, like an emotional dump. Then enjoy how much better you feel and carry that with you. If you have any holiday tips of your own on how you manage the stress of the season, please share them. We can all use the help with our sense of humor, holiday blues, and passive aggressives! LOL.
Filed under: Christmas, coping, dealing with holidays, Depression, handling stress, hidden feelings, mental health, New Year's Resolutions, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior, passive aggressive boyfriend, passive aggressive families, passive aggressive holidays, passive aggressive humor, passive aggressive parent, passive aggressive spouse, personality disorders | Tagged: avoiding depression, coping with a passive aggressive, dealing with passive aggressive peopl, difficult to, holiday blues, holiday stress tips, passive aggressive holidays, passive aggressive personality disorder, passive aggressive relationships, passive aggressive spouse |