Filed under: abuse, coping, hidden feelings, mental health, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior, personality disorders | Tagged: mental health, passive aggressive behavior, personality disorders, understanding passive aggressives |
Posted on July 5, 2008 by Ladybeams
“A personality disorder in which aggressive feelings are manifested in passive ways, especially through stubbornness, procrastination, and inefficiency so as to resist adequate social and occupational performance.”
I hope everyone had a wonderful 4th, and if you live with a passive aggressive I hope things went well for you.
Somethings about the passive aggressive I just don’t understand. I guess no matter how much research I do, there will probably always be things I don’t understand.
Years ago, when the passive aggressive BF and I started living together, we were looking at BBQs in Home Depot one day. He was looking at this really nice gas BBQ that had all the bells and whistles. How much he liked it. How cool it was. Right away it went in my mental filing cabinet as a b-day gift or XMAS gift, whatever.
Sure enough I went ahead and bought it for him. I had heard from mutual friends about what a BBQ’er he was, over and above what he had said, so I thought this was a perfect idea. Not only that, but then I could get out of being the one to BBQ all of the time. That was probably 8 yrs or so ago. He has used it approximately 3 times since I bought it.
I have no idea what happened. I know when we first told one of his buddies, the buddy of his started laughing like heck and said “You were always the one that said gas grills weren’t really barbequing. Now you bought one?”
I also know he doesn’t know how to tell how much gas is left in the tank. It seems to me anyone could just get a new tank. How tuff can it be? I don’t know. If you take it to someone that fills them, can’t they tell how much is left? The other day I mentioned about selling it. Didn’t seem to phase him in the least. I guess he figures I can BBQ on my Weber forever.
What’s funny is that when I had the bar, he loved bbq-ing there. We would BBQ on a Sunday for a potluck, etc. and we had great turnouts. He loved the compliments, being in the spotlight. We’d cook for a crowd of people. Get him to BBQ here at home? Never. Is it because it’s for family vs. a crowd?
I don’t know but he’s gotten his way for the last several years. If I want BBQ, I do it. Thank goodness I’ve been training my son. He’s actually getting pretty good at it!